


I Don't Have A Girlfriend, and other adventures in a galaxy far, far away

by BookGirlFan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Clone Wars, Friendship, Gen, Meet the Family, Secrets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-08 03:07:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 3,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5481014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookGirlFan/pseuds/BookGirlFan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exactly What It Says On The Tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was a long flight after an even longer mission, and Obi-Wan decided to have a little fun with his former Padawan. "Missing your girlfriend, Anakin?"

"I have a wife, Master, why would I have a girlfriend?" Anakin replied absently, then, at his Master's stunned silence, realised just what he had said. "Um, oops?"

"You - _married_ Padme."

Obi-Wan's voice was completely inflectionless, enough to make Anakin wince. Why oh why hadn't he paid more attention to what he was saying? "I never said I married Padme!" To his dismay, his tone rose childishly as he protested. 

"I'm not an idiot, Anakin! I know how much you-" Obi-Wan cut himself off, scathing tone seemingly unable to convey the full scope of his displeasure. 

Suddenly, Anakin wanted it all out in the open. Why should he have to hide it anymore? "What, Master? How much I love her? I love Padme, more than anything in the galaxy!" He finished with the three words he'd wanted to say from the moment they became true. "She's my wife."


	2. Chapter 2

Obi-Wan's voice, dangerously polite, came from the door to Anakin's quarters on the Resolute. "Anakin, care to explain this?"

Anakin took one look at his master and burst out laughing. His former master and best friend was absolutely blue. Not in any metaphorical sense, either; he was, quite literally, blue from head to toe. Or at least, so Anakin assumed, as Obi-Wan's Jedi issue boots rather stopped him from confirming. "You're- so blue!" he choked out through his laughter.

Obi-Wan crossed his arms, glaring at his former Padawan. "I had noticed that, Anakin. What I would like to know is why?"

A cough came from behind him. Both Jedi turned towards the source of the sound, and saw Rex standing in the hall, determinedly ignoring the colourful state of one of his commanding officers. "Sir," he reported. "Admiral Yularen needs you on the bridge."

Anakin stood up, calling his lightsaber to his hand with the Force. "What is this about?"

"New orders from Coruscant, sir." He handed over a datapad that Anakin quickly scanned, then passed to Obi-Wan.

Rex turned to leave, orders completed, then hesitated. "General Kenobi?"

"Yes, Captain?" Obi-Wan looked up at the captain, silently requesting him to continue.

"Blue's really not your colour."


	3. Chapter 3

"Sir!"

Obi-Wan looked up, and groaned at the expression on Rex's face. "He's at it again, isn't he?"

"Yes, sir. The little'un too." At Obi-Wan's raised eyebrow, Rex quickly corrected, "Commander Tano, I mean."

Obi-Wan sighed, then offered a farewell bow to the other Council Members. "I'm sorry, Masters, it seems I'm needed."

"Up to something, Skywalker is?" Yoda asked, a mischievous twinkle showing in eyes much older than even Yoda's years would account for. 

"Yes, Master, it seems so."

"Then fix it, you should. The Force be with you, Obi-Wan. Need it, you will." With a strange chortling laugh, the hologram flickered and disappeared, leaving Obi-Wan and Rex alone in the war room.


	4. Chapter 4

"I'm cold."

Obi-Wan held his padawan tighter at the sound of the softly worded statement, silently cursing the Jedi Council for sending them on this assignment in the first place. Matis Erl, with temperatures rarely raising above zero, was no place for a desert born apprentice who hadn't hit his teens yet. Worse than that, their ship had crash landed on the way to the diplomatic talks they were supposed to be overseeing, shot out of the sky by rebels. 

This particular faction supported the long held belief that the souls of Matisians were inextricably bound to their home planet, and took it further, believing that leaving Matis Erl would break those bonds, leaving that person soulless and alone for all eternity. 

At that moment, Obi-Wan had trouble reasoning why anyone would want to stay on Matis Erl, even for the sake of their soul. After their ship had crashed, they had found safety in a small ice cave, but with the sun going down and the wind only getting louder, it seemed possible that the Jedi would be spending the night in the frozen wasteland that made up most of the planet. In fact, Obi-Wan reflected, if no one found them by the next night, they might be spending forever in this little cave, preserved in the ice. 

Obi-Wan shivered, quickly dismissing the thought. "The future is ever changing," he whispered quietly, not wanting to wake Anakin, who seemed to have fallen asleep while he was musing. He held his padawan closer, tucking him further into the folds of his robe. 

It had been nearly three years since Qui-Gon had entrusted him with this strange little boy, and in that time, Anakin had shot up, now being almost too big to fit under his Master's cloak, though not quite. Anakin might even outgrow him in the end, Obi-Wan thought wryly, not displeased with the idea. Provided they lived long enough to find out.


	5. Chapter 5

"Anakin Skywalker was your father?"

Luke nodded, looking questioningly at Leia. 

"My father told me stories about him," she elaborated. "Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, the heroes of the Clone Wars. They won battles across the galaxy, before the Empire came."

"Old Ben was a hero of the Clone Wars? No way!" Luke's face lit up at the thought, grief from Ben's death temporarily banished. 

"He saved my father's life, more than once. They were friends." For a moment, Leia's facade of calm threatened to crack, her devastation at the loss of her planet showing through. 

"He's that Kenobi?" Han's voice came from around the corner, soon followed by its owner. "Didn't look much like him."

"You knew Obi-Wan Kenobi?' Luke asked. 

Han swung a chair around and sat down facing the back of it. "Everyone knew him, kid. The Negotiator, one of the Heroes of the Clone Wars. Couldn't miss it. Holos were up everywhere, of him and Skywalker too." His eyes widened, then sunk into a scowl. "Aww, kriff it. You're related to that Skywalker?"

"Anakin Skywalker was my father," Luke declared with soft reverence. 

Han rolled his eyes. "Explains a lot, actually."


	6. Family Dinner

They walked into the room, then stopped short at the sight of Darth Vader sitting at the other end of the long table. 

"Sit down, Captain Solo," Vader said in his deep, raspy voice. Han briefly considered going for his gun, but knew it would be useless in respect to all the guns pointed at them. They took a seat. 

"Now, Captain Solo," Vader's menacing red eyes fixed on Han. "What are your intentions regarding my daughter?"

Han's mouth dropped open. "What daughter?"

"Your ploys can't fool us," Leia said sharply from beside him. "We know you don't have children, Vader."

Vader turned his gaze on her. "Your ignorance betrays you, Princess."

"What daughter?" Han repeated, louder than before. His gaze flicked back and forth between the two glaring at each other, then he slumped back in his chair, staring at the ceiling. "Kriffing Sith hells! I shoulda never agreed to rescue you!"

"What are you talking about?" Leia hissed, still not breaking her gaze. 

Han pointed at her. "You. Him. Related."

"It seems you are less ignorant than you appear, Captain Solo."

Han shuddered. Vader almost sounded...pleased. 

Beside him, there was a shocked gasp. He turned to see Leia's face blanch, then being to tinge green. "No, it's not possible!" she choked. 

"I assure you, it is. You are my daughter."

The green tinge spread. Leia stood up, covering her mouth and striding towards the door. 

"Do not leave this room."

Leia turned on him, voice cold and sharp with anger. "I will not be ordered by you, whatever relation you claim to have!" She made to continue.

"Stop there, or Captain Solo dies."

Han suddenly felt a cold pressing sensation around his throat, pulling tighter and tighter. He tried grabbing at it, pushing it away, but his fingers clutched at nothing. His vision began to darken, the lack of air starting to affect him. A faint ringing started in his ears. Over it, he heard Leia say, "I'll stop, now let him go!"

The hold loosened slightly, enough for him to gasp a quick breath and push the darkness back a little further. 

"Come back here." Leia returned to the table, steps tight with restrained fury. "Now sit down.” She sat. The band released from around Han's throat, and he immediately took a deep breath, trying to restore air to his starved lungs. Under the table, he felt Leia's hand touch his, and he grabbed it gently, holding it in his, giving him a warm, fuzzy feeling inside. He considered. Nope, still didn't make up for the sithspit the rest of the day had turned into.


	7. Chapter 7

Bail rubbed his eyes tiredly. It had been a long day, filled with unproductive meetings and more and more proposals restricting the rights of citizens across the galaxy. He, along with some trusted friends such as Padme Amidala, had been working behind the scenes to ascertain where these new bills were coming from, but it was slow and tiring work; one wrong push could threaten his position as Security Minister, and leave them even more in the dark than they were already. 

Distracted by his thoughts, it took him a few moments to realise the door chime had sounded. Hastily flipping over a few of the more confidential papers, Bail strode to the door, wondering who would be stopping by this late at night. 

"Obi-Wan!" His eyes widened then quickly furrowed. "Has something happened? Something I need to know?"

Obi-Wan shook his head, not meeting Bail's eyes. "No, nothing... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have disturbed you."

He made to leave, but Bail reached out, hesitating a moment, before grabbing his shoulder. "I was distracted anyway... Tell me, is something wrong?"

"Not...precisely." Obi-Wan's cool Jedi reserve faltered just long enough for Bail to glimpse the weariness beneath. 

"Come in." Bail stepped away from the door, opening it wide enough for Obi-Wan to slip in behind him. They both took a seat on the ornate lounge set taking up most of the room, Bail noting his friend's unease and sitting opposite him, despite wanting to sit close and uncover whatever had the Jedi so uncharacteristically off balance. 

"Would you like a drink?" he offered, beginning to stand up. Obi-Wan shook his head, and Bail sank back into his seat. A long pause followed, enough to fray Bail's overburdened temper. "Kenobi, unless you tell me something, I cannot help you."

"Anakin and I have been on Coruscant for two weeks now," Obi-Wan finally started, keeping his eyes and voice low. Bail just nodded, unsure where this was going. "Most missions, we share quarters, but on Coruscant, Anakin stays...elsewhere." His tone conveyed quite clearly that yes, he had a good idea where 'elsewhere' was, and no, he did not need that confirmed. "I'm...not accustomed to the quiet here."

Bail's brow furrowed curiously. "You want to...sleep here?"

His tone must have come out more sceptically than intended, because Obi-Wan immediately straightened up, rising to his feet in a remarkably graceful manoeuvre for someone, Bail could now see, looked like they would fall over on the spot from exhaustion. "I'm very sorry for disturbing you this late, Bail, I'll leave-"

"Obi-Wan!" Bail raised both hands, calling a halt to the polite exit. "You're my friend. Believe me, this is the least I can do. Please, stay here for the night." Seeing Obi-Wan's still stiff posture, he tried to lighten the mood. "With all the paperwork I have here, someone might as well sleep tonight!"

Obi-Wan's posture softened slightly, recognising the joke for the peace sign it was. "Thank you, Bail."

"It's no problem, my friend." He gently pushed Obi-Wan towards the bedroom. "Rest. I'll be right here."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to the previous one.

In his defence, it had been a very long night. After working for hours on policy updates and new security procedures, Bail had completely forgotten about his guest, and as a result, when he walked into his bedroom just as the sky outside had begun to lighten in preparation of the dawn, he had been very surprised to tumble into his bed, eyes already closing in anticipation of the scant few hours sleep he would get before he needed to wake again, and be met with a warm body curled up under the blankets. Immediately he shot upright, tired eyes snapping open as he frantically ran through any possible candidates for being in his bed. Assassins, but any that was good enough to get through his security system was good enough to not fall asleep in his bed; Breha, but she was at home on Alderaan, and far too busy for a sunrise visit; and that was it. Who else could possibly have reason to be in his bedroom, in his very bed? 

It took his tired mind longer than it should have to connect the dots, but when he did, Bail began to laugh softly. Of course: Obi-Wan had come by, unable to sleep without someone else's presence, even if he would never put it that way, and Bail had offered him use of his bed so the Jedi could get some sleep. 

Surprisingly enough, Obi-Wan hadn't even twitched at any of Bail's actions. Bail's brow furrowed. That seemed uncharacteristic of the man he knew. Then again... Obi-Wan had said he and Anakin had been back for two weeks, and Anakin had been gone every night; with what he had learnt last night about Obi-Wan's sleeping habits, it seemed likely to assume that Obi-Wan hadn't slept for any of those two weeks. 

Bail cursed under his breath, trying not to wake the sleeping Jedi, although by this point, he doubted he could. Looking closer, he could see the dark smudges under Obi-Wan's eyes, the fine lines that had formed during his time away. In sleep, Obi-Wan looked both much too young and much too old, not old enough to carry the weight of the Republic on his shoulders, yet ancient enough to have seen horrors no man should ever see. 

Eyes slipping slowly closed again, Bail out the matter aside. Maybe tomorrow he'd talk to Obi-Wan about getting more rest - not that the man would listen to him, stubborn son of a gundark - but tonight, he needed his sleep. The hours of rest he could get before waking up and starting again were few enough as it was, and even an interloper in his bed would not stop him from taking fullest advantage of them. 

Bail slumped against the pillows, eyes slipping closed once again. He didn't both opening them. As he drifted off to sleep, the sound of breathing filling his ears and providing him with a peace he never expected, he mused sleepily, We should do this again.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of the last two.

Over the last few months, Bail and Obi-Wan had developed a pattern. If Obi-Wan was on Coruscant, and not too tied up with mission de-briefings and strategy sessions to escape for a while, he'd come to Bail's apartment to sleep for a while, only able to relax with tangible proof of someone else's presence nearby. Bail would either work on his own reports and meetings, or, if at all possible, he would come to bed as well, taking nearly as much peace as Obi-Wan from knowing there was a living, breathing human right next to him. 

Of course, he would far prefer such a living breathing human to be his wife, but the war had taken a serious toll on both of them, and Breha could not leave Alderaan; whenever possible he would go back home to be with her, but time had become a sparse commodity. 

Tonight, Obi-Wan was breaking their routine. Instead of going to bed, or, as had happened more often recently, spending a few moments to talk with Bail, he had huddled up in one corner of the expansive lounge set, Jedi robe curled around him like a shield, eyes looking out on some far away place Bail couldn't see. 

"Obi-Wan? Is everything alright?"

Obi-Wan blinked, coming out of his daze. "We're in the middle of a war, Bail, how alright can it be?" He smiled slightly at Bail, taking the sting out of his words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted more, but the story was stubborn; that's the end.


	10. Chapter 10

Rex watched General Kenobi enter the mess hall, blanch, and quickly turn and exit. "Something happen out there?"

Cody, seated opposite, hunched further over his meal, grimacing. "Lost six hundred men over on the western side. General didn't take it well."

Rex bowed his head in understanding. Losing brothers was always hard, and the Jedi were protective of their troops, Kenobi and Skywalker more than most. Losing that many men at once was not easy to take. 

Cody kept talking. "Nothing anyone could have done about it, even a Jedi. Ground collapsed beneath them."

Rex snorted. "Try convincing one of them that. They think they're invincible."

Cody nodded in silent commiseration, and they both went back to their meals, musing on the hopeless naivety of the Jedi generals fighting in this war. Sometimes, much as they might want otherwise, a brother couldn't be saved. Even a Jedi can't save everyone.


	11. Chapter 11

"Anakin, you're a child!" Obi-Wan stormed into their apartment, pulling his Padawan along by the braid. 

"I'm not a child, Master! I'm already nineteen!" Anakin protested, the childish words sounding odd in his deep voice. He tore away from Obi-Wan's grip, crossing his arms and standing proudly. "I love Padme, and I don't care what the Council say! I married her, Master!" 

Obi-Wan stood stock still, staring at his Padawan. 

"Master?" 

Finally, Obi-Wan spoke. "Sithspit." He turned towards the kitchen. "I need a drink."


	12. Wardrobe Mishap

"Padme, is there any reason you are wearing a Jedi robe?"

Padme looked down and swore silently. When C3PO had told her Obi-Wan was outside and needed to see her, she'd just grabbed the first thing lying beside her bed and hurried out. She hadn't thought that she had worn Anakin's robe to bed last night, as a feeble fantasy of him being with her, and therefore naturally it was closest to her bed that morning.

Now, Obi-Wan's tilted eyebrow and half smile was mocking that thoughtlessness. "It does look rather fetching on you, though I am curious how you acquired it."

"A gift," Padme said, standing tall and pulling the robe further around herself. If she was already caught, she might as well play it out. "A Jedi gave it to me, and I've kept it since as a reminder."

Obi-Wan nodded slowly, still with that raised eyebrow. "They are quite comfortable."

An awkward silence followed.

Padme did not feel inclined to break it.

Neither, it appeared, did Obi-Wan.

It may have carried on all day if not for C3PO re-entering the room. "Mistress, do you need - oh! Master Kenobi! I do apologise, I had not intended to interrupt."

Padme smiled at the droid. "It's alright, C3PO. Could you bring Obi-Wan a drink?" The droid obligingly left, and Padme turned to Obi-Wan, smile decidedly cooler. "I'll be just a moment. Make yourself comfortable."

Obi-Wan gave a slight nod, and Padme left the room. This Jedi robe had already caused enough trouble, she would not stay in it a moment longer!


	13. Return

Leia strode off the cruiser and into the base, flanked by her boys on one side, and the droids on the other. Even wearing a bikini, covered as it was by the Jedi robe Luke had thoughtfully given her, she looked commanding and purposeful.

"Leia," Luke called out from behind, "can you slow down? Han's sight hasn't fully come back yet."

Leia immediately slowed, falling back to join the other four. "It hasn't? But I saw you shooting at the Sarlacc earlier, when it was trying to eat Lando."

Lando snorted. "Don't remind me."

Chewbacca roared mournfully.

Han patted him on the shoulder, gaze just slightly off. "Hey, don't worry about it! I'll be right in no time."

Luke leaned in towards Leia, whispering in her ear. "He's right. It's already a lot better since yesterday."

Leia nodded, forehead still furrowed. She knew that, but that didn't change that it never should have happened in the first place. She loved Han, more than she would care to admit, even to him. Especially to him, the arrogant nerf-herder. This war had already taken so much from her; her planet, her home, her family. She would not let it take this new family too.


	14. Help Me...

"You were my brother, Anakin! I loved you!"

Obi-Wan looked down at the face of the man he used to know, barely able to watch as he was slowly consumed by the flames. He turned away,mutable to bear the sight any longer. If there was any chance that Padme may yet survive, he needed to go to her, not dwell on his own mistakes.

"Help me..." The moan was low, nearly more mental than verbal, but it was enough to make him turn around.

Ana- Vader was looking up at him, skin peeling, flames burning their way up his back. Yet all Obi-Wan saw, as slight as it was, was the slight hint of blue creeping back into his eyes.

That was enough. He Force-lifted Anakin out of the lava, and started heading back up to the ship, hovering Anakin before him. Once, he slipped on the unsteady ground, but his grip on Anakin never faltered. By some miracle, his brother had been returned to him. Eventually, Anakin would need to face the consequences of what he had done, but for now, there was hope. That was enough.


End file.
